Tuesday, April 10, 2018

Story clean up.

Crossing the bridge



On Saturday the 16th of March 1852, there was a farmer and her brown and white cow. The farmer’s name was
called Peaches.They were on their farm in Auckland they decided to sale all there milk by a market.


First the farmer Peaches got her cow and tried to get the cow to move come on Bessie.” She said as she was
struggling to pull bessie. Peaches grabbed her coins and she went to William Johnsen the toll keeper. She gave
william johnson 1 coin for her and 1 for her cow.


“Evening Johnson” she said as she was waiting to cross the bridge”.


William Johnson took the money and said “thank you very much,enjoy your day.” William Johnson used his
strength to turn the winch”. That the farmer could go through the bridge and go to the market. The farmer and the
cow got to the market . The farmer got the bucket and milked the cow like it was cleaning the cow, to sell the milk
to the villagers.


The farmer looked and looked to see if anyone was coming to get some milk. But then she saw one person in
line to see if it tasted nice. So she gave the nice lady some milk and she said .WOOP.”!!!, that's the best milk
i've ever tasted.” So she bought some milk Then took it to her kids and they shared the milk together. After she left
she told everyone about the milk and there was a whole line of people waiting to get some milk. Then he got to the
last person and there was no one else in the line. So she packed up all her stuff and took her cow home. Then they
got home and they jumped straight on to their beds and went to sleep.


Recount checklist ✓✓✓✓✓✓✓✓
Surface features
Searched
Found
Fixed
Capital letters at the beginning of a sentence
Capital ‘I’
NO

Capital letters for names of places and people
Full stops at the end of a sentence
Speech marks when people are talking
Punctuation - ? ! ; : ‘

Words are written in past tense

Connectives - next, then, afterwards

Interesting and difficult adjectives

Deep features



Introduction has who, what, when, where, why, and how

Conclusion has a reflective statement or says how you felt

Ideas/events in the right order

3 paragraphs

Metaphors and similes
Different types of sentences - short, long, compound and complex

This is what we are doing for our writing we are cleaning up recounts that don't have
things that it is suppose to have in that story that they are doing.

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